Bedtime Puns

Hello, friends. Some bedtime puns for you:

What's the difference between a poorly-dressed man on a unicycle and a well-dressed man on a bicycle?
Attire.

What lies at the bottom of the ocean and twitches?
A nervous wreck.

What do you call a thieving alligator?
A crookodile.

What do you call a pig who does taekwondo?
A pork chop.

What do you call an ordinary potato?
A commentator.

What do you call an owl that does magic tricks?
Hoodini.

What do you get from a pampered cow?
Spoiled milk.

Where are average things manufactured?
The satisfactory.

What do you call a number that won't stand still?
A roamin' numeral.

And a compliment to see you off:
If you were a fruit, you'd be a fine-apple.