Writing Prompt #6: Dogs

Tanner's prompt for today is Dogs.

Oh, boy.

Shortly after moving to Oklahoma, I went to the local animal control shelter and adopted a dog. I named her Kensi, after the NCIS: Los Angeles character. I put her in my backseat to drive home, and within a couple of minutes, she had crawled over the center console into my lap. She's not a small dog, and my car isn't a big car, so this was a bit of a problem. But all it took was her trying to lick my face while I was driving to make me fall in love.

I wanted a pet because I was going to be living all alone for the first time, and I knew I would need a reason to not just sit in my living room and binge watch Hulu when I wasn't at work.

Also, I just like dogs.

I wasn't allowed to have pets inside my house, so Kensi lived in the backyard and garage. She would have rather been inside, but the backyard and garage provided opportunities for her favorite activity: fetch. I learned very quickly that tennis balls were the best thing in the entire world to this dog. Treats are great; she likes meeting new people; squirrels are exciting; but tennis balls, oh man, they are the best, paws down.

I say that, and now I'm going to immediately contradict myself. Tennis balls are second on Kensi's list. Number one on her list is me. I've never had another pet (except maybe my cat Sabrina growing up) who just adored me, specifically, so much. My family came to visit me just a day after I brought Kensi home, and don't get me wrong, she loved them right away, but even if they were all outside with her, if I went inside, she ran to the door and whined. She just wants to be with me all of the time.

Exhibit B of this phenomenon: I worked just across a large parking lot from my house. Kensi watched me walk to work every day. One day, she got out of the yard and came and scratched at my office door to be let in. She didn't want to run away. She just missed me.

When Tammy came to live with me, Kensi was the best icebreaker I could have hoped for. Tammy loved Kensi instantly, and it was mutual. We went on many a walk and played many, many games of fetch. Tammy used to put on "dog shows" in our backyard and at the neighboring park.

Tammy's middle school was just down the block from our house, and we usually walked there and back. Kensi became a staple of the schoolyard; kids loved to greet her after school every day while I waited for Tammy. When Tammy started high school, I brought Kensi with me almost every day to drop her off and pick her up. Dog selfies in the car became my life. Check out my Facebook feed if you don't believe me. At least half of my pictures (if not more) are dog selfies.

Kensi also proved her worth as an author. She wrote a few Christmas cards. I did the actual writing, since Kensi doesn't have thumbs, but she told me what to say. She always signed off with, "Merry Christmas! Woof!"

Life in Oklahoma wasn't easy, but I always knew that Kensi would have a smile for me. Without her, I don't know that I would have made it through.

When we moved to Wisconsin, there was never any question: Kensi was coming with us. It's been lovely getting to have her inside the apartment. She keeps my feet warm at night and my kitchen floor nice and clean. She greets our visitors and snuggles on the couch and keeps watch from our balcony. Life has never been better for this dog of mine.

This coming Tuesday morning, both of our lives are going to change. Kensi will become someone else's dog. But that's not what I wanted this blog post to be about. I wanted to remember the good times. If you have any good memories with Kensi - and I know many of you do - leave them in the comments below.

Stay tuned for May 18th: Grief/Loss.

The End of the Decade

Hello, friends.

I'm going to do the stereotypical "it's the end of a decade" post here. Because it is! And it's interesting and informative to reflect back on what the last ten years have been.

In 2010, I turned 18 years old. I graduated high school in Iowa and moved to Wisconsin to begin my first year of college.

Since then, holy cow, a lot has happened.

I graduated college in 3 years.
I've had 9 different jobs and lived in 4 states.
I made a lot of new friends and lost touch with some old ones.
I've gained a sister-in-law and seriously cute godchildren.
I became a dog-mom, and then a foster mom, and then an adoptive mom.

The end of 2019 finds me recovering from following my dreams to Oklahoma. My recovery has led me to Milwaukee, with my wallet a little tighter than before, but my heart much fuller.

Looking back at who I was in 2010, I doubt I ever would have guessed what the next ten years would hold. I never thought my first church work job would be campus ministry in Florida. I would have been aghast to think that my first call would end so painfully. I hoped I'd find my husband by now.

So many things are different than I thought they would be, but that doesn't mean they're bad. I'm ending the decade on a good note, in a good place, with good friends. It may be a note I never would have predicted ten years ago, but it's a good note nonetheless.

Along the same lines, I have no guesses as to where I'll be in 2030. I'd like to see myself in a stable job, with a husband and maybe a few more kids (biological, adoptive, foster, whatever). That's as specific as I want to get. God will fill in the blanks. After all, He certainly did in the last ten years. I have faith that whatever He's got planned for the next ten will be equally surprising and ultimately good.

The Month My World Turned Upside Down

Hello, friends.

September 2019 - the month my whole life turned upside down in the best possible way. Let me walk you through it.

September 5th: the joyful day that I was officially able to welcome my daughter, Tammy, into my family through adoption. This day was such a long time coming, but at the same time, it seems like very little changed for Tammy and me. We've been mother and daughter for three and a half years. A signature on a piece of paper doesn't make that more real. However, it was a very emotional and exciting day. I'm so glad my parents were able to come and witness it!

September 6th: Tammy's last day at Enid High School. She had so many positive experiences there and made a bunch of friends. I know it was hard for her to say goodbye.

September 7th: the day the moving truck came and hauled away pretty much everything we own. Without my parents and Lindsey Duerr, we never would have gotten everything packed in time! We were also blessed to be able to see Pastor House and Audrey.

September 8th: my last day as the DCE at Redeemer. Many of you know that Redeemer was a stressful place for me the past few years. The pastoral vacancy was overwhelming, and even when it finally ended, things didn't get better. I was hoping and praying for over a year that God would lead me and Tammy elsewhere, and as God always does, He opened a new door at exactly the right time. It was bittersweet to leave Redeemer. There were a lot of wonderful people there, and I loved the opportunity to use my gifts and talents to share the good news about Jesus. On the other hand, of course, it was a relief to be able to walk out of those doors knowing that I wouldn't have to go back. Tammy was also able to have one last hurrah at the mall with her friends.

September 9th: the day Tammy, Kensi, and I said goodbye to Enid and began our trek north. We paused to see our friends Samantha, Aaron, and Lydia in Kansas before stopping at my parents' house in Iowa for the night.

September 10th: I turned 28, got to see my brother, moved into an apartment in Greenfield, WI, and partied with Lindsey, Bryan, and Melissa. You know, an average day.

September 12th: I started my new job at Concordia Lutheran School in Sturtevant as a teacher's aid for the fourth and fifth grade classes. Meanwhile, the moving truck arrived and my apartment became an obstacle course of cardboard boxes.

September 13th: I acquired a second job as the Customer Service Representative at Mrs. Myers' Reading Room in Mt. Pleasant, just down the road from the school.

September 15th: Tammy and I went to Hales Corners Lutheran Church for the first time. It was so refreshing to worship without working, and with friends! I feel like I could get used to this.

September 17th: Tammy started at Greenfield High School. Go, Hustlin' Hawks!

September 21st: Lindsey's Harry Potter themed bachelorette party with Sara and Nicole! What an exceptionally fun day.

September 22nd: We spent the afternoon at Lindsey's apartment, where we helped prepare wedding stuff and watched the Packer game and generally enjoyed ourselves. What is this concept of having friends to hang out with?

September 29th: Tammy started her last year of Confirmation at Hales Corners. We just got back a couple of hours ago, and my heart is so full.

These are not the only things that have happened. Tammy and I have explored Milwaukee a bit and discovered fun places like a park near our apartment and this small lake you might have heard of called Lake Michigan. I've seen my friends several times a week; they've helped us assemble furniture and unpack boxes and go on Target runs and just generally been amazing. I was telling Melissa earlier today (in person!) that although I am fully aware that moving to Wisconsin is not a magical solution for depression, there is something incredibly curative about having a support system around me. I feel like the parts of me that are broken and bruised are steadily healing. It will take time. But there's nothing I can't do with these people by my side. With them, I feel like I can conquer the world.

September 2019 - the month my whole world turned upside down. I'm in a healthy place, with people I love, jobs where I feel appreciated, and an apartment in which my dog can sleep on my bed.

Life is good.

Blessings I've Found in Enid, Oklahoma

Hello, friends! If any of you have talked to me lately, you've probably heard me sounding pessimistic. I've been doing a lot of complaining. This blog post is to help remedy that. I hereby present to you "Blessings I've Found in Enid, Oklahoma."

The only thing I can put first is my foster child. She's a handful, all right - but she's just a kid. More than that, she's my kid, and I love the way she laughs at my jokes, makes the most creative art projects, teaches Kensi new tricks, gets excited about the strangest of things... She's a joy.

Next on the list is my church. Sure, it has problems. Every church and every workplace does. But whenever I walk through those doors, I take something positive away. For example, last night, I attended a meeting. Someone had baked brownies for it, but she forgot to bring them. I jokingly suggested that she bring them to church today - so she did. Let me tell you, they were delicious.

Some of the people at church simply blow me away in their kindness and generosity - the young people in particular. I recently realized that I need a babysitter. I called up one of my high school students, and I had no idea what she would say. Not only did she agree, she was willing to drive over immediately if I needed her right that second.

Speaking of caring for my child, she has been enrolled in day camp for the past three weeks. She's technically too old for the camp, but the camp director has been fantastic. She understands my daughter's special circumstances and works with her at every turn, even when my daughter isn't necessarily interested in doing the same.

This list could go on for days, but I'll end it with this: I love my dog. When I need a smile, she's got the best one around.

Stream of Consciousness

Hello, friends! I hope you're having an excellent Thursday. It's actually my Friday, tomorrow being my day off. I've been relaxing (read: watching excessive amounts of the tv show Forever) pretty much since I left work.

Now, normally when I write blogs, I have some idea of what I want to get across to you, my readers. (Apparently, some of you are in Ukraine... Hi there!) Today, I've got nothing, but I'm bored, so here we are. Therefore you're going to get my stream of consciousness for awhile. :)

Work is interesting. Sometimes I know exactly what I'm supposed to be doing, and I do it, and I feel accomplished. Other days I sit in my DCE study and look around and think, now what? Today was one of those days to a large extent. Maybe this will clear up with time. Or maybe I'm just perpetually confused. Either one is possible.

Speaking of sitting around, I do a lot of that at home these days. I still haven't made a whole lot of friends in Enid. Anyone know of effective ways to make friends your own age in a new town?

On the upside, I do have my adorable dog. Today I gave her a couple of ice cubes. She chewed them up, but only after she spent several minutes chasing them around the patio because they kept slipping out of her mouth. I'm so easily amused...

Lindsey was amused by my dog, too. My dear friend visited last week, which was absolutely delightful. I have missed my twin so much. I can count on one hand the number of people who can make me laugh like she can. For example, she gave me a lecture on how I eat bread. In case you're wondering, I eat it like a barbarian. Or so I'm told. She's also still complaining about how I ate spaghetti on a particular night four years ago.

While Lindsey was here, we visited a museum that documents the Oklahoma strip land run. Basically, they had people register, then had them line up along the border with their horses, wagons, etc. They then fired a gun into the air and thousands of people rushed as quickly as they could into the strip to stake their claim. There were all kinds of injuries because, well, it was a horse race with no rules or referees. Also, there were four offices for these thousands of people to register their claim with, and these offices had three clerks each. People had to wait for up to a week in line. Can you imagine that happening today? Holy cow. I can hardly even picture it.

(Also, in the late 1800s, houses commonly had muslin hung from their ceilings to keep large bugs from falling on people's heads. Lindsey and I decided that we're okay with that not being a big problem today.)

(We were also mistaken for LDS missionaries, I guess because we were two girls together?)

Well, my stream of consciousness seems to be drawing to a close for the moment. I'm completely ready to settle down and watch another episode of the sadly and ironically short-lived show Forever. Goodnight all!

A Christmas Doggie Devotional

Hello, friends! Merry, merry, merry Christmas! I'm writing to you from my garage, where my dog and I have been engaged in a celebratory game of fetch for over an hour.

(Before anyone says, "Why are you not with your family?!", let me reassure you, I will be seeing my family soon. My nephew, along with a few other people probably, will be in Urbandale over New Year's, so that's when I'm going home.)

Now, back to that celebratory game of fetch. Pastor Jay once told me that you can make a spiritual analogy out of anything, so here's my attempt. :p

My dog lives in my garage, because I'm not allowed to have her in the house. Every morning, the first thing I do is get up and let her out of her crate. She is beyond excited to see me. We usually go for a walk or play some fetch before I feed her. Then I have to go to work, so I lock her in her crate again.

When I come home for lunch, the first thing I do is let her out of her crate. She's beyond excited to see me. We go for a short walk and I let her hang out outside on her tether (which is no longer attached to any windows) while I eat on the kitchen. Then I have to make the long trek across the parking lot back to work, so I lock her back in the crate.

When I get off of work, I return home and let my dog out of her crate. She's beyond excited to see me. This is usually when we go for a nice long walk, often an hour or more. We play fetch in the backyard or "find-the-treat" in the garage. I feed her around 4:30. However, I do have to leave her by herself outside or in the garage while I am productive (or unproductive, as the case may be)  inside. She's always rather sad when I leave her alone. She checks the kitchen door every few minutes to see if I happen to want to play fetch. Then, when I go to bed, I lock her in her crate and leave her for the night.

Now, I tell you all of these mundane details about the life of Kensi for a reason, I promise. Kensi is what every good Christian should be: she is enthusiastic, persistent, dedicated, and loving. Just like Kensi, I should be enthusiastic about my God. I should be persistent, constantly checking to see if my God has anything new to do or say. I should be dedicated, always willing and eager to do whatever it is that my God sets before me. And finally, I should be loving. I should emulate my loving God in everything I say and do.

Notice I said "should." I'll be honest with you - I don't do those things; at least, I don't do them all the time.

But there is this wonderful holiday. Maybe you've heard of it. It's called Christmas. On Christmas, Jesus Christ was born. Jesus Christ came to earth to fulfill all of our "shoulds." Jesus was enthusiastic, persistent, dedicated and loving from the day he was conceived to the day he died - and to the day he rose again, and still even to today. There has never been better news in all of eternity.

Because of Jesus, my "shoulds" turn into "cans" - as in, my "I should be enthusiastic" turns into "I can be enthusiastic - in Christ." My "I should be persistent" turns into "I can be persistent - in Christ." My "I should be dedicated" turns into "I can be dedicated - in Christ." And my "I should be loving" turns into "I can be loving - in Christ." Just like the angel told Mary, "Nothing will be impossible with God."

Now, before I finish this blog, there's another spiritual analogy I want to make. My dog's whole life revolves around me coming into the garage. When I'm not present, she sleeps. End of story. This is yet another way in which I can copy my wonderful animal. My whole life should revolve around my God. It doesn't - but because Jesus's did, mine can, too. And the great thing is that I don't have to wait for my God to come into my garage, so to speak. He's with me always, and that is never more evident then on Christmas.

From me and mine, to you and yours, with love, merry Christmas. I pray that you keep the hope of Christ's birth in your heart today and always.

Don't Cry Over Broken Windows

Hello, friends. Here's what I have learned today:

Storm windows are great at protecting your house against storms.

Storm windows are not so great as an anchor for your dog tether.

And, finally, the trustees at my church are wonderful.


...I'm sure some of you are wanting the whole story, so here you go. I have a fairly narrow backyard, and no matter where I put the stake for my dog's tether, my dog can still get under the fence. Today I noticed that there was a handle on the outside of the storm window in my kitchen. It seemed pretty sturdy, and it would prevent her from getting under the fence, so I attached her tether to that and went back inside. This was a poor decision. In fact, it was a terrible decision. About half an hour later, I heard an enormous crash from outside. I raced out my back door to find the storm window on the ground, completely smashed.

Thank God, Kensi wasn't underneath the window when it fell! She is completely unharmed, and the non-storm window is still intact, so my house isn't exposed or anything. I brought my dog inside and promptly called one of our church trustees, because I had absolutely no idea what to do about the situation. He came over within a few minutes, took a look at the problem, and not only helped me get rid of the smashed window, he also brought me something so that I can attach Kensi's tether to the house without breaking anything else. He said he'll probably get a new storm window and put it up on Monday. Thank God for trustees! I don't know what I would have done without him!

He also said something that made me feel a lot better: "It's all part of loving a dog." These things happen when you bring anyone else into your life, really, not just a pet. You open yourself up to more problems than you would have if you were alone -- but you also open yourself up to more joy. My dog may have brought my window crashing down, but she's also brought me a reason to look forward to coming home. Without her, I'd probably still have a window, but I wouldn't be having nearly as much fun.

A Day in the Life of a Lay Minister (with a dog)

Hello, friends! I hope your week has started off well. It occurred to me as I started to type that I spent all day on Thursday brainstorming for our Midweek program. Thursdays are typically the day that I plan for the following week, but I was so busy brainstorming, I did no planning. Therefore I'm going to present to you A Day in the Life of a Lay Minister - as I plan what I'll be doing tomorrow.

6:30 Wake up, dress in sweats, walk dog.
7:00 Feed dog, eat own breakfast, take shower, dress for work.
8:15 Walk dog. (You'll sense a theme here.)
8:30 Commute across parking lot, begin work day with a devotion.
9:00 Plan confirmation lessons for Monday afternoon one-on-one session with student and Wednesday regular class period.
10:00 Submit registration materials for OK'D in Christ, the Oklahoma district high school youth gathering. Plan travel and housing for OK'D.
11:00 Send out reminder about Friendsgiving event coming up next Sunday. Plan games.
12:00 Commute across parking lot for lunch. Walk dog.
1:00 Write and practice Opening skit for Midweek.
2:00 Type up sign-up sheet for the Advent meal the youth are hosting. Send out to parents. Plan further fundraisers for Youth Gathering.
3:30 One-on-one confirmation session with student.
4:30 End work day. Commute across parking lot. Play with dog, walk dog, feed dog, eat own dinner, probably go to Hobby Lobby, watch Once Upon a Time on Hulu, wash dishes, walk dog again, go to bed.

There, now you know what it's like to be a lay minister with an energetic dog, and I know what my life is going to be like tomorrow. Ish. I feel better. Now, it's time for me to go walk my dog (again) and go to bed. Goodnight, world.

Dogs vs. Humans: A Study

Hello, friends! Today, Kensi and I spent several hours practicing a new concept. It's called "walking on a loose leash so no one chokes or has their arm yanked out of its socket." We were somewhat successful, but we still have a long way to go!

I had a lot of time to think while I was walking... and stopping... and walking... and stopping. Hence, what you see before you now. I present to you "Dogs vs. Humans: A Study."

Observation #1: Every moment is a teachable moment.
Subtitled: Consistency is key.

I did some reading on dog training earlier today. One of the suggestions that stuck with me is this: "Until your dog has mastered this concept, consider every walk a training time." It's so true! If I am strict with Kensi and only let her walk on a loose leash for one walk, and then I turn around and let her pull like no other on the next walk, that won't teach her anything. It will only confuse her. I have to train her consistently, or nothing will happen.

The same can be said of humans. For example, right now I'm trying to teach my confirmation students about respect for each other. One way I'm doing this is to only respond to them when they're being respectful (i.e. not talking out of turn, not talking over each other, being kind, etc.). If I kept this up for one class and then let them do whatever they wanted the next class, they would never learn about respect. I have to be consistent if I want them to learn.

Observation #2: Don't underestimate or overestimate.
Subtitled: Listen!

Kensi is a smart dog. She's a shepherd/retriever mix, and both of those breeds are very intelligent. However, just because she's smart doesn't mean she's going to automatically understand what I want her to do. I shouldn't overestimate her, and I shouldn't underestimate her. Instead, I should do my best to listen to her. If I'm observant, I can tell how she's reacting, what that means, and how I should proceed.

This is also true for humans. My main confirmation class is on Wednesday evenings, but one of my sixth graders can't make it that night. (She is in 14 school activities. I'm not exaggerating.) So I'm teaching her one-on-one every other Monday. I walked into our first session on Monday not sure what to expect. Given the amount of activities she's in, I assumed that she was probably very smart. However, I had no idea what her faith life was like. The best course of action for me was to not overestimate or underestimate her. Instead, it was my task to listen and find out where she is that way. Through my observations, I was able to get a sense of how we should conduct class in the future.

Observation #3: Everything takes time.
Subtitled: Duh. But really!

I've had Kensi for a week and a day now. We've come a long way in that period of time. I know what her favorite thing is (tennis balls). She knows that I'm probably coming back if I leave. I know that she's full of energy. She knows that I give her tasty treats. However, there are many, many more things for us to learn about each other - and there's no way to find them out except to continue learning. It will take time, and that's okay!

Again, this is the case for humans as well. Last Sunday, I gave my first children's message. It was delightful! The kids responded just like I hoped they would. (Except for the part where they got me to admit that I'm not dating anyone in front of the entire congregation.) However, I know that I won't get that kind of response every children's message. I have to take the time to get to know them - all of them - in order to be an effective Director of Christian Education for them. That's the way it is and the way it should be.

There you have it, folks: teaching humans is just like training dogs, except with less drooling. Usually. ;) I'll leave you with a picture of Kensi training me to throw the tennis ball. See that intense stare?

Epic Things About Oklahoma

Hello, friends! I promise this blog will be slightly longer than the last one. Not because I'm less tired, because I'm probably more tired, but because so much has happened and I want to share it with you! For your reading pleasure, I present to you: Epic Things About Oklahoma.

1. The people!! I am enjoying getting to know the people at Redeemer so very much. I've met people between the ages of 3 months and 92 years and have enjoyed all of them. A specific story for you: a wonderful couple from church invited me to dinner and gave me quite the extensive tour of Enid. They're both photographers, and I loved seeing their studio!

2. The church! Let me tell you, the sanctuary alone would make me love Redeemer. It's recently redone with beautiful stained glass and incredible architecture. But apart from the sanctuary, I'm a fan of pretty much everything! A specific story for you: we have such an abundance of classrooms that I have a room for my confirmation class that is only ever used for my confirmation class. Hooray for not having to clean up every Wednesday!

3. The town! Oklahoma and Iowa feel like they're cut from the same mold. I'm loving it here. The weather has been great, and today I found a cool walking trail. A specific story for you: Wednesday night, Audrey House and I went on a trip to Camp Lutherhaven. Not only was the camp incredibly amazing, we passed by some mesas not far from Enid that look like perfect hiking material.

4. The district! I got to meet a bunch of Oklahoma district folks at the bi-annual convention at the beginning of this week. They are pretty cool, let me tell you. A specific story for you: I spent a few hours with a group of DCEs planning a high school youth gathering. Insert high-pitched squeal at the realization of a church work nerd's dream.

5. This girl!

Today I adopted a beautiful shepherd/lab mix named Kensi. We spent the day learning about each other. I learned that she knows how to sit on command, catch tennis balls in midair, and play tug-of-war. Meanwhile, she learned that me being out of sight for more than ten seconds is not cause for alarm. (We're still working on that last part. But there has been progress!)

6. The people! I know, I said that already. But some exciting people are showing up tomorrow to celebrate my installation and commissioning on Sunday. I'm very much looking forward to it!!

Was that enough exclamation points for you? I hope so, because I need to go take a certain dog for a walk. Good night!